Olive Juice

So back in January of 2001 I met this woman. She was a server at the Bennigan's I worked at. She transferred down from Las Cruces to the Louisiana Benny's. I walked in and saw a butt I hadn't seen before. She turned around and I saw the eyes that would forever change my life. Two days later I had my first kiss with this woman. That was the night my heart learned to sing. We hung out quite a bit after that night. Our first real date was at Club R&B. I had planned on reading some poetry that night for her to hear, but never got called up. So we went to the duck pond at UNM and I read for her. Unfortunately I had a pretty bad case of the hiccups. It's kinda hard to be serious and profound when there is a "hic" every three words. We continued to date, and after two weeks I knew this was gonna be the woman I married. I remember developing feelings for her very quickly. So quick that I wanted to tell her I loved her, but felt it was too soon so I just said "elephant shoes" because when you mouth the words it looks like "I love you". Soon we moved in together. Shortly after this my father died. She was there for me through, what I thought then, was the most difficult period in my life. Turns out that the most difficult time in my life was ages 11-32. Over the next 6-7 years we would experience some of the greatest times two people could have. And some of the worst times. I married this woman in 2003. Wonderful wedding with family, friends and a little bit of wind. Two years later our daughter was born. We were living in the bay area. We both had great jobs. We took impromptu trips to the beach or San Francisco. Times were good, except when they weren't. I was anything but a desirable husband. I was a drinker. Now when I say drinker I don't mean like go out on the weekends and party. I mean drink heavily every day all day. I would disappear and not call. And come home to a crying wife. This went on most of our entire lives together. I was the worst kind of person. There were so many times that she threatened to leave me. Finally, due to situations involving police, jail and judges I saw a tiny sliver of light slip into the darkness of my world. That light continues to get brighter every day. And the brighter it gets the more saddened I become thinking about how awful I was to the one woman who always saw the best in me, even in the worst of times. I don't think I could ever apologize enough. But I am going to try. Every day for the rest of my life I am gonna let her know that without her I could never be my best. Without her I am nothing. I LOVE YOU, A.M.O.

'Nite Y'all.

 

"My best chosen friend, companion, guide, to walk through life, linked hand-in-hand, two equal, loving friends, true husband and true wife."
Sir Charles Gavan Duffy